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Mr. Lava's Trash Music Compendium Another round-up of the best, the worst, and the most intriguing trash of the past and present.
2001 Scooter encourages all clubbers to kill anybody who plays this song--now why do that? In addition to the multiple versions on iTunes, there seems to be another more happy hardcorish variant somewhere out there (sample above) which, in reflection, seems increasingly to be a mysterious anomaly from those lawless days of Napster (perhaps this was a demo cut?). But the official original edition is excellent, too. 1999 For proof that Paul Van Dyk is a good producer and super DJ, but not much of a composer, take a listen to Jennifer Brown's "Alive (Bleachin' Club Mix)," which became the basis for his own "We Are Alive." Not all that different, huh? 2000 Like Paul, Barcode Brothers also found themselves a little short on ideas one day, so they decided to revise everybody's favorite Opus 3 song, "It's a Fine Day." Most covers of this tune give a little less than the fantastic original; the Bros. give a little more with a nice original bridge. Listen to those seagulls cry! 2001 DJ Tiesto's "Flight 643" would make great action music for some airline hijacking movie. But we're still bummed out by 9/11, so we'll relegate this to the dancefloor instead. As is typical of Tiesto, this tune features just two notes. It was instantly hailed a masterpiece by his (take your pick between) devoted/deaf followers. 2001 Estrella's "La Playa del Sol" is a bouncy trouncy flouncy pouncy fun-fun-fun-fun-fun piece of Spanglish Eurotropical Dumdum Pop. 2001 Fragma concurs with Jennifer Brown that "You Are Alive." This one has a nice, soaring chorus that lifts it higher than their usual fare. 2001 Valerie Rossi's album Ricordatevi dei fiori is a fine piece of Italo popif you see it in your local music store buy it. Interestingly, the album comes in a Spanish language version, too. "Tre Parole," a huge single from that album, gets the requisite Italo dance remix treatment here. 2000 Would be a good song if only it didn't have that terrible f-word in it. "It's all in your mother f*ing mind" the guy says. For shame! 2001 Magic Box's "4 Your Love" is yet another one of those vocoder-driven pledges of enduring love, the sort of song sung by knights in shining armor, guys with floppy hats strumming mandolins, and yowling cats perched on fences. 1994 Volta's especially frantic "To the Beat" is smashing classic Eurodance, which is to say: here is your basic male rapper, female diva, and big synth riffs. 1999 2 Eivissa's sexually assertive "I Wanna Be Your Toy (Extended Radio Edit)" sets the women's lib movement so far back it winds up eight miles ahead. Printed on the cover of my copy: "Boom, Boom! Der Super-Sommer-Hit '99 aus Spanien." It seems to owe a lot to the classic 1891 can-can number "Ta-Ra-Ra Boom-De-Ay!" As much as I love this song, I must ask a technical question: What's the point of having an "extended" radio mix that only tacks on a mere forty secondsand in such a fashion as to make it no easier to mix with? 2001 DJ Centaury and Wavetraxx are the masterminds behind the somewhat silly yet oddly powerful "Dark Angel." The second half, where the melody comes sweeping in, is so breathtaking that it compelled me to interview Wavetraxx in order to confirm that he was, in fact, not a God. As it turns out, he isn't. In fact, he's a Swiss kid working at a local gymnasium. Go figure! 2000 If you've ever wondered what a Eurodance tune with a "Smells Like Teen Spirit" sample in it married to a horrible spoken word bit (sampled from ska legends Madness) would sound like, here's your chance. It's scary to criticize this, as Mr. Balloon wields a huge gun on the cover of the CD single, but if Romania can stand up to the tactics of intimidation that typify corruption, so can I. 2000 The Barcode Brothers show a playful side as they take S.O.A.P.'s "S.O.A.P. is in the Air,"--will you forgive me for this?--"to the cleaners." They load it with comedy sound effects and animaniac energy that smokes the original. This is billed as the "club mix" on the CD single (the Barcode Bros. name only appears in the fine print). S.O.A.P. were effectively the training-wheels pop project for Simon Fuller (name-checked in the lyrics) before he created S-Club 7 and the smash reality TV series "Idol" and all its various country-by-country offshoots; at least on S.O.A.P. song was later reinvented by S-Club 7.
The running of the bulls! It looks like standing in the streets and getting doused by water is about as much fun as being goredand might be safer. 1999 Trance Allstars' "The First Rebirth" was the debut single from the best DJ supergroup since . . . OK, so I don't know of any other DJ supergroups. ATB, DJ Mellow-D, Schiller, Sunbeam, Talla 2XLC, and Taucher all have a hand in the pie. The song? It's a cover of a 1994 track by Jones &l Stephenson, and eeez reeeelly, reeeelly boo-tee-ful! No vocals; just shimmering, pulsating electronic sounds. Talla's is my favorite remix. 2001 Missyna, out of the German hip-hop group Basis (which offered the super-sexy "Ich liebe mich") rocks hard here. In the video, she raps in great leather clothes on top of a fevered backdrop of drum and bass jackhammer rhythms and sweeping cinematic strings. Why all the hub-bub? It was used as theme music for the second season of the "Popstars" reality/music TV series in Germany (thanks, fellow Wikipedian). 1999 French Affair's "My Heart Goes Boom (La Di Da Da)," sung by sexy Barbera Alcindor, is a classic known to any European who was between the ages of 9 and 39 when it came out. Continues the ATC "Around the World" trend of "la-la" nonsense vocals (see also Millane Fernandez, below). It also contains some spoken French. After five years of being off the radar, French Affair re-emerged in 2006 with a drastically retooled sound. 1992 When I was in a club in sleepy Williamsburg, Virginia back in 1993, a DJ who spun lots of 2 Unlimited assured me that the other great Eurodance band (that is to say, a band featuring male rapping, diva wailing, and big synth hooks) of the then-present era was AB Logic. Check out the power of their eponymously titled song, which is called, well, that would be "AB Logic," wouldn't it? 1999 Embarrassing confession: shortly after 9/11 I heard Ace of Base's "Life is a Flower" on a Romanian Internet radio station, and I cried. Their pledge that "We live in the free world..." couldn't have hit me at a more vulnerable time. 2001 A good dream dance-like tune. Little tickly notes here, big keyboard blasts there. It works. 2001 This one's pretty impossible not to sing along to. Contains Eiffel 65-ish vocodered male vocals and a soaring, clean female voice to carry its anthemic chorus. The Swedish Eurodance auteur has also arranged death-metal interpretations of his tunes. Seriously. 2001 Barthezz's "Infected," trash of the techno-ish variety, moves like an evasive rock wallaby. 2001 Millane Fernandez's "Dam Dubi Dam (I Miss You)" is a sugary pop song sung by a German teenager, and is another ATC-ish/Eiffel 65-ish "dam-de-dam" type song, as the title reveals. Dieter Bohlen out of Modern Talking crafted it, and it sounds uncomfortably like what a middle-aged man might think a teenager girl would want to sing. Millane went in an R&B direction sometime afterward. Frivolous but amusing technical issue: the CD single contains an "Extended Radio Edit." So if the "Radio Edit" was "Extended," then what was the "Radio Edit" an "Edit" of? 2001 Gabry out of Eiffel 65 delivers something madder and harder than he did in that group, with entertaining loops of a female vocalist on top of pulverizing beats. 2001 Mellow Trax vs. Shaft's "(Mucho Mambo) Sway" updates the original Shaft classic by giving that song a pounding trance flourish. Dean Martin would have busted moves all over to this. And that would have been scary. Various If you're interested in sampling the wares of boy/man synth-pop group Bad Boys Blue, just track down one of their many "Megamixes." It's all the BBB you'll ever need. 2001 The John Denver country classic is turned into a Eurodance one, with boisterous sing-a-long qualities. 1994 This may be the most famous happy hardcore song after anything by Blümchen. As for which version is best, I'm partial to a hybrid of the Radio Edit and the Rotterdam Mix myself. I want to have it all. The compendiums: |
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